“Ain’t no rest for the wicked, money don’t grow on trees- I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed- there ain’t nothing in this world for free…” -Cage The Elephant
There are nights sometimes when I crawl into bed, exhausted, and as I close my eyes my brain begins to churn the sea of midnight madness.
I sit there for hours as my mind forcefully replays every single argument, humiliation, and situation I’ve ever been in, will ever be in, and have never been in, over the entire course of my life. I rewind the clock in my cavernous noggin over and over again, wondering what would become of the now if I could just tweak a bit of the then. I replay frightening moments in shocking clarity as if I were still living them and I experience the existential pain of emotions I will never be able to heal. I experiment with “what-ifs” and travel down roads not taken, anxious over futures not yet set in stone.
And I do it all in silence, in the dark, waiting for sleep to take me so that I may instead be haunted by my dreams.
In today’s age, we all carry some form of baggage. Many of us more excitable folks have matching sets of luggage we bring from relationship to relationship, situation to situation; we wonder why our same issues keep turning up- as if we forgot we brought the Louie Vutton carry-ons of BS right on board the crazy express.
Some of us don’t even realize we’re bringing the baggage, it’s wrapped so deeply around our identities that we’ve become our suitcases.
For a long time, that’s who I was. The ignorant blonde in Row 4 wondering why everyone around me always left, and I was always the one giving too much of myself. I remember defining myself as the “fun until you get to know me” girl. I never considered that it wasn’t who I was but who I was surrounding myself with that was the problem, because I’d always been taught that I wasn’t enough.
I credit my husband allowing me to unpack my shit all over his side of the mattress for bringing my senses around to the fact that I was going to forever repeat the same cycles if I didn’t learn to break it now.
When I got pregnant with my son, I created a magick Healing Oil to rub on my stretch marks, and to heal the past so I wouldn’t spread my baggage all over his future. I used it often over the nine months he resided in my womb, but after he was born, it kind of fell to the bottom of a very long list of “to-dos”.
As my medication has begun working, it’s also rehashed a lot of cobwebs that I’ve yet to dust out of the corners, and I remembered my Healing Oil spell, and how well- even after 8 years- it worked to create the bond my son and I share.
This time, I wanted to severe bonds between my current self and the me of before, healing the wounds that have resurfaced unresolved. This oil sits for a week, to let the herbs “simmer” and then is strained so you may use it on the skin. As with all new oils or topical treatments, test on a small area of the skin before using fully to make sure you do not have a reaction.
Healing Oil for The Wicked
- Liquid Coconut Oil (or another carrier oil you prefer; Coconut is one of my favorite for spells that will be used topically)
- Frankincense Oil
- Eucalyptus Oil
- Lavender Oil
- Palo Santo
- Lemon Balm
- Rose Quartz*
- Clean Glass Jar, or Bottle
As always, cast your circle- or as I do, light your black and white candles and cleanse your space. I love using Palo Santo because the smell just puts my mind at ease and in the right space to begin my magick.
I like to cleanse my jars before using them; therefor, I light a disk of charcoal, place Frankincense and Myrrh resins along with Palo Santo dust and run my jar through the smoke. Once I feel its energy is cleaned, I will begin crafting the oil.
There are no specific measurements, as this is not a recipe- it’s a spell. Use what feels right to you.
I fill the jar about half way with the coconut oil. I will place my energy and into this carrier oil before moving on.
I like to put in my herbs first, but this is not necessary. For each one, I hold on to it for a few minutes, creating a connection with my intention.
Rosemary: To strengthen the memory, allowing you to move past those that hold you back- and to remember the ones that bring you peace and joy.
Sandalwood: Scatters negativity, and brings about deep emotional healing.
Palo Santo: Smooths energies, creating an honest connection with your past and your present that lets you understand where you’ve been has brought you to where you are.
Lemon Balm: Removes tension and treats worry and insomnia. It also heals heartbreak and past traumas.
Hawthorne: Strengthens the heart’s ability to feel pain and release it allowing you to heal old wounds; absorbs emotional negativity that causes circle thinking.
Rose: Attracts self-love and healing, creating a soothing inner dialogue to overshadow the “bad” thoughts.
After each herb is imbued and placed in the oil, I then add the oils.
Frankincense Oil: Cleansing and healing of your energy; protection from negativity caused by past traumas or emotional pains.
Eucalyptus Oil: Heals the Heart Chakra while energizing the brain to remove negative connections.
Lavender Oil: Relieves stress and induces calm
Top the jar off with more coconut (carrier) oil if you’d like.
Then the oil sits on my altar, away from the sun for about a week. Sometimes I let it sit longer, depending on how I feel. Shake it often, at least a few times a day.
When the oil is vibrating with energy, it’s time to strain it. You can use the herbs to burn or discard them. However, I do suggest if you burn them, to do so on a charcoal disk as the oil can cause them to be unpredictably combustible.
Place the Rose Quartz into the jar, to continually promote inner peace and self-love, and it is now ready to use. Coconut oil is great for healing stretch marks or other marrs on the skin, but it will sour after about two years (less if in direct sunlight) so make sure that you date your jar if you’re not using this consistently.
If you’d rather use it as an anointing oil, you don’t need to strain it at all. I make two small batches- one for the skin and one for my candles. One gets strained, one doesn’t. I add the strained herbs from the first batch to the second one for even more potency in anointing.
I like to use this oil right out of the shower, or a particularly long bath of cleansing. I also use it when I’m meditating or preforming Shadow Work, allowing myself to heal the broken areas in my past. It’s beautiful on the skin, and smells absolutely wonderful which helps with its purpose!
Heal on, love.
Until next time, my friends…