Tarot Talk- Does He Love me: Yes or No?

As someone who has been reading Tarot for a long while, I think the most often question I get asked is “Does he love me?”

I’ve come to realize lately that some readers find these questions to be beneath them. Maybe it’s that I’ve lived the life of an insecure lover more than once, or that I’ve felt the rejection of unrequited love a few times, but I completely understand the need to ask a higher source to validate what we hope we see.

Image Credit: Tenor

I don’t think asking about love is trivial, as it’s the base for all human interactions. It’s the culmination of our experience wrapped into a four-letter word. Does he love me is not a simple question, it’s an enigma wrapped in a mystery tied with the bows of insecurity and delivered by the doubts perpetuated by society.

We live in a world that dismisses intuition, denies mysticism, and denounces “feelings”- yet, here we have a tool that connects directly to the Universal energy (Divine, or what have you). Who wouldn’t want to reach out and ask what’s most on their mind?

Normally, I don’t suggest using a Yes or No format when questioning the cards- no matter what the subject. The reason is simple: Tarot doesn’t see in such black and white. Even the question “Does he love me?” is subjective. If he loves you as a friend, is that not love? If he loves that you are kind, but doesn’t find you physically attractive- is that still “love”? The cards will answer you, but your intent directs the inflection in which they speak. You’ll color the answer it gives with your own meanings, not even realizing that it was giving you the most literal answer it could.

Yes doesn’t always mean yes in the way you want it to, nor does no always mean no in the way you assume. Yet, they’re never wrong. Confusing, isn’t it? It’s like ordering a sandwich and getting a hotdog- it’s technically not wrong, but it’s not what you wanted either.

A better phrasing could be: “how does he feel about me romantically?” This narrows the field of view for the cards to his romantic interests, which is what you’re more than likely asking for, and leaves the door wide open for a more specific and less literal interpretation.

But- not everyone likes that wiggle room. Some people prefer the definitive answers- and today, I’m going to show you how I give them!

First step- Yes or No questions are asked from the Major Arcana only! So, instead of drawing from 78 cards, I only draw from 22. This not only makes it easier to draw, it narrows the subjectivity of the cards. Suits, in my opinion, are pretty neutral in directional interpretations- so, why shuffle and pull from them??

Next, we need to assign definitive positive and negative traits to each of the 22 cards, and decide whether reversals negate those traits (or oppose them).

Example:

Empress, to me, always means a resounding yes. In love readings, it’s a sexual and romantic yes. In financial readings, it’s pregnant with possibilities- yes. However, no matter the interpretation, it is always positive.

Facing the opposite way, it’s a negative- but not a no. It means that there’s potential for a yes, but it’s not in the way the querent hopes. In love readings, this might signify a platonic love. In financial readings, it might mean there need to be more intuitive or creative in their venture to gain what they want. The potential for a yes is there, but it’s not as clear cut as they’d like it to be.

If you’re not into reading reversals, then the Empress would be yes no matter how it came out of the deck!

Though I suggest looking at the cards and determining their meanings for yourself, here are how I look at them:

Tarot CardUprightReversed
0.       The FoolPossiblyNo
1.       The MagicianYES!Negative (thoughts have power)
2.       The High PriestessMaybeNo
3.       The EmpressYES!Yes, but not without limitations
4.       The EmperorNO!Still NO!
5.       The HierophantNo Maybe?
6.       The LoversYes Maybe 
7.       ChariotMaybe?No- stuck
8.       StrengthYesPotential No- lacking courage
9.       HermitNoNo
10.   Wheel of FortuneYES!NO!
11.   JusticeSureNope
12.   The Hanged ManNoMaybe
13.   DeathNO!NO!
14.   TemperanceMaybeLeaning toward No
15.   The DevilYes (not good)No (not good)
16.   The TowerPossibly?No
17.   The StarYesYes 
18.   The MoonMaybeNo
19.   The SunYesMaybe
20.   JudgementNO!No
21.   The WorldYesProbably not

YES! is a resounding positive, while on the opposite spectrum NO! is a resounding negative. Maybe? means that it’s more unsure than a regular maybe. And, as you can see, there’s few reversal yeses. I don’t interpret reversals in a normal spread as always negative, but for some reason in a Yes or No question, they’re normally not positive.

So, let’s play a game! I’m going to ask a few yes or no questions that I’m absolutely sure of the answers; you pull a card and then determine whether or not the answer is in the affirmative or the negative! I’ll hide the actual answers so you can check your intuition! Let me know in the comments how you did!

Is blue my favorite color? -YES!
Did I constantly sing the “Free Willy” song as my show and tell in Kindergarten? -You betcha! Haha!
Do I like Mongolian Food? -NO! (I can’t stand my food touching- weird, I know)
Did my husband and I graduate the same year? -No
Is my spirit animal a goat? -NO!
Was I born in the year of the Rat? -No. (Rabbit)
Is my most precious material possession a stuffed bear named Teddy? -YES!I’ve had him since I was born!

Did you get the right answers? If you didn’t, do you feel that the card was representative of the right answer (as in you misinterpreted it) or do you feel that the card itself was wrong?

Let me know below!

Until next time, my friends…

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